Everything must go, including me

After we finished with the movie, Sid and I had a couple cigarettes and talked about the whole breakup. He has a real talent for getting to the truth of the matter. It's a byproduct of knowing me for over twenty years. He knows when I'm hiding something.

My bluff got even harder to hold up when my boss called me. He reconsidered, and said that anything I needed to do could wait until Tuesday morning. Well, shit. I didn't tell Sid right away. I didn't want to let go of my only bargaining chip.

We got back to the breakup. It's strange that this was the preferable topic of conversation. After a while, we got to the heart of the matter. I wasn't happy in the relationship, neither was she. Things were getting progressively worse day by day, and the breakup was an all-too-welcome change. I said I was okay with it all. I'm on my own again, and I don't need that kind of drama.

Sid cried foul. He said I was in denial. He was trying to get a rise out of me. He said that if I was really okay with all of this, then why did I have mementoes of the relationships all over my new place?

Man, I hate to admit when the dude has a point. At least half of the things on my shelves were acquired during the relationship. I'm a 27-year-old man, and I have a Valentine's Beanie Baby on my entertainment center. I still have pictures of her hanging around. I have Sleepless in Seattle on DVD.

Again Sid makes some solid points. Am I really over her? Hell, we broke up less than three weeks ago, so the answer is obviously no. However, I am happier without her. Do I still think of her? Yes I do, but they're not happy thoughts. What triggers these thoughts? A lot of these things lying around might just be the answer to that.

So, Sid and I set about cleansing the place of any shred of her memory. All the stuffed animals, pictures, everything with the smallest touch of femininity must go in the trash. We've been tossing stuff in a huge garbage bag for about an hour, and we're about to carry it all out to the dumpster and lay it to rest. I must admit, it feels good. I finally understand minimalism.

Sid's been right so far, so I finally concede. I'm gonna go with him to this reunion thing. Who knows, it could be fine. If not, we'll be driving back early. It's pretty much win/win at this point.

Although, I'm getting pretty good at bullshitting myself.